Disillusioned

A lot has happened to change my views on relationship n marriage.

Living in Vietnam has certainly opened my eyes. I was never exposed before when I was living in Singapore so I grew up with strong fairytale notions of happy-ever-after.

Sure, we all know someone whose relationship/marriage is or has broken up. And we always thought to ourselves, this will never happen to us. But I'm not so sure anymore.

It's no longer just stories of people but to know of people who are f-king around outside of their relationship or marriage. Or to hear about men who come to Asia for business trips but essentially engaging in paid services or keeping mistresses here.

Granted, everyone has issues in their relationship. 'Perfect' doesn't exist because even if a couple puts on a loving front in public, you'll never really know what goes on behind closed doors.

My friend has just broken up with her husband of 10 years (just because he got up one day and decided that this life was not good enough for him anymore). And recently, I found out that a person that I really respected has been living a double life for God knows how long.

The funniest thing is, it usually happens to the best wives I know (esp the 2 examples above!)- women who adore their husbands, devote themselves to serving their men, women who are beautiful inside and out. I'm beginning to think nothing is ever good enough. Men juz take for granted what they have!

Seriously, how can you really trust anyone these days? The lifetime partner that you have chosen and centered your life around, can so easily turn around to become a complete stranger overnight.

At a recent girls night out, we talked about how men think they can find something refreshing, start chasing passion n romance again with a new person... Without realizing that the relationship will eventually go stale, become routined and the (once) hot and fun chick transforming into their existing (controlling, nagging n "boring") wives.

At least we women are not as delusional - we are "wise" enough to know all men are the same. You'll never know if you'll end up with someone worse or better but you know that he can never replace his position as the father of your child. And that is why, some women choose to put up with what they have.

In that aspect, my respect for women has grown. ...

God help us! And thank you for making women the stronger ones!