Friendship, Relationship and Forever-ship

Met up with Felicia and Janelle yesterday. We ended up sitting at the coffee shop from 7pm to 1.30am just catching up and reminiscing the old days.

I think we must not have seen each other in over half a year.

In the years that we've known each other, we've seen a few boyfriends come and go. Most significantly, Fel and I broke up with our biggest loves and have moved on to marry the next guy that came into our lives. I can't say that we fully recovered but we have found happiness and contentment in our own ways. Fel is now a mother of a lovely boy while I have settled in Vietnam with my T. Jan is still with her big love of 3-4 years, a relationship that we know all too well (a passionate roller coaster ride full of ups and downs).

Her relationship doesn't look like it's going anywhere in the next 5 years (as he builds his career) and in her attempt to catch up with us on marriage and motherhood (Her biological clock is ticking), she is left pondering her next step.

Despite her own dilemmas, Jan is convinced that we are not truly happy... that we settled for stability over love (a reason why she is still with the big love). Fel retorted that it's a different kind of love but that she is contented n happy in her own way. I told her there's no way I will ever look back.

True. First loves are never easy to forget. The memories, the fun time, the emotion, the passion and not to forget the roller coaster ride that we went through - all becomes a part of us.

We all have (had) our idealistic views about love and relationship. Every young girl will choose romance and passion over anything else. But then as we start to grow, experience heartache and are thrown flat-faced back into reality, many of us will sooner realise that it is better to marry someone who loves u more, who respects you and treats you right, who can provide you with stability and security, who you can grow old with.
(Most of all, I believe you should always marry someone who makes you a better person.)

Like I can't stress enough, there's no turning back for me. I hated being the crazy monster that obsessive love can turn one into. Look at me now... I'm independent, I'm happy, I have a life, I have someone who loves me and whom I love and am grateful for changing my life. We live in perfect companionship and though it's not as romantic or passionate as I wish it could be, I cant ask for anything more. (m'shahallah)

And if I were to advice my children in the future, I will stick with my decision and advice them to marry their best friend/companion.

We also reminded each other that there is no perfect relationship. There's no way to say who's happier than who and who has the better deal. At the end of the day, there's always the good and bad so all we can do is to make the best of what we have.

All in all, we had a great time catching up. I treasure our friendship because we've been through so much together and are always here to support each other. And even though we are all in different parts of the world most of the time, we would meet up and not feel the spaces between. It will be like we just saw each other yesterday.

I'm looking forward to sharing the rest of my lives with these friends. Who knows what the future will bring? I only know that we will be around to support each other through the joys and the sorrows.